Today lovely lady has one friend over, neighbor girl. The fine young gents' six-year-old cousin spent the night. Lovely lady's other friend arrives, and neighbor girl takes her leave while friend #2's mom admires Poppy and I notice a puppy puddle. I throw a clean-up cloth over the puddle and I take Poppy out to potty, which she does, and as we are going back inside the phone starts to ring. Poppy doesn't want to go through the door. "C'mon, sweetie," I coax. Nothing doing, she says, quite clearly for someone who cannot speak. Ring. I scoop up Poppy and maneuver my way past the screen door to grab the phone. It's a dear friend. "Hello, dear friend!" I say, as I start to grab a roll of paper towels to clean up the puppy puddle. No paper towels. Rats. Figures.
Dear friend and I had a nice long chat. As we talk, here's what I'm doing:
I get a new roll of paper towels from the garage and clean up the puppy puddle. Pet the puppy. The fine young gents come shouting into the room-- they're playing knights. I stop chatting for a short moment to ask the boys to be quiet. I pick up the toys off the floor and rescue another Hot Wheels from the puppy by offering her a chew toy instead. Gents come shouting into the room again-- there's a dispute brewing. Poppy is pulling on my pant leg with her tiny puppy teeth. I gently disengage her then I ask four-year-old gent to wait until I'm done talking on the phone, and motion "Shhh" to all with my finger to my lips, and out they go. Poppy starts chewing on my pant leg. In roar the gents again, so I go close myself in the bathroom. Dear friend remembers that her mom used to hide in the bathroom too.
"At least I'm not trying to frost cupcakes this call," I said. "So I'm not trying to monitor three kids waving knives full of frosting while I talk." Dear friend laughs. "You missed your chance," I told her, "We were dyeing eggs earlier. That would have been a fun conversation, interspersed with 'Oh! Ack! Stop! Oh no, quick! Grab a towel! Not everyone can use the pink cup at the same time. Eeek, it's overflowing! Oops! Please give that back to your brother. Don't pour that in your hair!'" Dear friend laughs again. She thinks I'm joking.
We continue to chat while I look out the window. Loving husband is doing a project instead of making a list of projects to do. The shock leaves me feeling temporarily dizzy. (Loving husband is a hard worker, so I am mostly poking fun.) I take puppy out to loving husband and head in to the kitchen to empty dye out of the coffee mugs, now all pink or blue on the inside. I put away Easter eggs, look outside and run out to rescue my red rubber boot from Poppy. I hide in the bathroom again while dear friend tells me about her kitchen remodel and we talk about our upcoming girls' weekend. It's so quiet in the bathroom. I can actually hear what dear friend says to me.
Dear friend and I finish our talk as the gents pound out into the back yard for a round of backyard golf. I knock on the window, point and shake my head as I mouth "NO" at one misbehaving young gent. I wander out into the sun-between-showers. For the most part, though, they settle in to back yard play so that I can really focus on the conversation. A conversation with a real live grownup, and this time there's no pink or green cupcake frosting smeared on the phone.
It was lovely to talk to you, B. I can't wait to see you next weekend.
Part One, In Which I Make a Phone Call But Not Really
Part Two, In Which I Actually Dial the Phone and Make a Phone Call